Ahh Wedded Bliss - Notice She Doesn't Look Too Happy - The Willows - Church Bells Will ring
With This Chain I Thee Wed - Frankie Lyman Why Do Fools Fall In Love
WHY AM I MARRIED?
You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.
__________ At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man." __________ A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine." __________
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him. __________ A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished . __________
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying." __________
A young son asked, "Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son." __________ Then there was a woman who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late." __________ Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. __________
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep. __________ Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all. __________
First guy says, "My wife's an angel!" Second guy remarks, "You're lucky, mine's still alive." __________ "A Woman's Prayer: Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a man , to Love and to forgive him , and for patience, For his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to death"
He said:I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it I answered:You wear pants don't you?
He asked:Shall we try swapping positions tonight? I answered:That's a good idea - you stand by the stove & sink while I sit on the sofa and do nothing but fart. He asked:What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? I answered:Turn sideways and look in the mirror.
He asked:Why don't women blink during foreplay? I answered:They don't have time I asked:Do you know how many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? He answered:No.
I said:Thatís because itís never happened. He asked:Why is it difficult for my sister to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? I answered:Because they already have boyfriends. I asked:Do you know what they call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? He answered:No.What?
I answered:A widow. He asked: Why are married women heavier than single women? I answered:Because single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
Oh Yeah, Honeymoon Great After That - Stinky Socks & Snoring - Robert & Johnny We Belong Together
The Fi Tones - I Belong To You
Sailing On the Sea Of Marriage Can Be Rocky - The Shirelles - Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow
All Good things Must Come To An End - The Bell Notes - I've Had It